12 Comments
May 4, 2023Liked by Sara Saljoughi

“I related to it because I think I’ve been so existentially dependent on approval that I’ve lost connection with a younger self who at some points was able to “go on being,” to use a favorite idea from D.W. Winnicott.”

YES YES YES. I had never read or heard this feeling named, and you did it perfectly. Thank you for sharing 💖

Expand full comment
May 4, 2023Liked by Sara Saljoughi

I look forward to your writing for all the reasons that this essay clarifies. How you write so generously and rigorously all at once. Gentle and vigorous. How I'm still holding in my mind's eye the purple fingernails and the image of Lizzy Kaplan and my projected image of your child calling your attention to the blossoms. Thank you for this gift.

Expand full comment

Belatedly, this was great — especially the idea to "go on being." Could you recommend where one might start with Winnicott?

Expand full comment

Children often see what we can easily overlook and as you say, this comes from someone else in their life spotting what they can overlook <3. Beautiful words, looking forward to your next letter xx

Expand full comment
May 4, 2023Liked by Sara Saljoughi

"which feels like lifting boulders looking for crumbs, or chasing something that never was, or sculpting something that is inchoate but luminescent."

MMM! WHEW! I felt this one. ❤️

Expand full comment
May 4, 2023Liked by Sara Saljoughi

Ah, I love those moments when my kids hit me with their unblemished perspective. I loved this!

Expand full comment